My Heart As A Moving Box...

Moving is an arduous task. A move can take months of preparation and advance planning. You have to decide what is important to you and those will be the things you take with you. You have to make a choice about what is less important and can therefore, be left behind.

Once the selection has been made, you take care to guard the fragile items and packing commences.
You cushion those objects and surround them with a barrier so they will come to no harm. Protecting the things that are dearest to you seems like a natural defense.

The vessel weighted down with delicate matter, laded with precious cargo and the truth is that you know you could survive and go on without these prized possessions but, their loss would be noticeable.

Though you have taken great care to pad and shield the contents, they are jostled and turned loose from their blockade. They are shattered into a multitude of pieces which may or may not have irreparable damage.

In some cases, it is left for you to decide if the value of the loss is greater than the lesson.

This is the exact position my heart sits in today. It is difficult to know what the right thing to do is in any uncomfortable situation. There are no clear answers, no easier way and no high road.

I was asked to read about loving the unlovely. I have read it, sat with it, ruminated it, reread it and I can honestly say, without any doubt that it IS entirely possible to love the unlovely.

In doing so, though, the side effects are not as one might imagine. The process of loving someone who feels they are unlovable is draining and has made me feel a churning in my core. Lacking are the kind feelings and the sweetness one generally exudes while loving someone; these have fled  from my side.

I am looking to the great leaders, in meditation, as I cannot do this alone.

The conclusion I have been shown is that all of my teachers have the same lesson..Live in Joy, In love, even among those who hate...Fill your mind with compassion...Expand/Radiate/Dissolve...Everything in the Universe is within you. Ask all of yourself...and so on.

So while it is possible to love the unlovely...it is a true test of faith to do so. Faith in love, faith in everything I have ever known of love and mostly, faith in myself that I am doing what I am meant to do.